he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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