why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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