I just made out with a guy for $7.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
