you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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