I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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