If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
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