So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
