I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
