I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
