If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
dude. I can hear the air.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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