how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
