Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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