I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
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If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
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if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize