There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize