white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
