My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
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NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize