do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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