We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
