1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
