Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
