Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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