I just threw up on my dentist
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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