Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
don't judge my taste in strippers
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
