Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
someone get that fucking seahorse.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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