just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
