quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
ttyl tear gas
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
