i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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