i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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