sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
