It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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