i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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