I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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