He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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