I just made out with a guy for $7.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
they need to just BURY HIM!
only if we run a train.
done.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
