nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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