You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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