Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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