I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize