Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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