Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
