I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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