what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
