Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
