Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize