he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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