no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
