Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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