She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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