I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Dick very happy bro
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
