I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I am spending my child support on dildos
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
