all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
