let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
